MY GOD! It’s full of WANK!
on December 1st, 2009Muchly amusing arts and letters wank.
A playwright has accused critics of showing up for a performance in a state of drunkenness, which is, apparently, not the best condition in which to review a play (insert derisive snort here). Critics accuse playwright of being a sore sport. Upscale wank follows. A sample:
It began with a Walker review in which he said his night was ruined by “Giant Haystacks sitting directly behind me: his huge, hot tummy protruded ever more insistently against my head and shoulders as the evening progressed. I am not sure if he was leaning forward or he was simply so colossal that his tummy could impact upon me even with his back to his seat. I didn’t dare look. I started to fret that this was the way I was going to go: fighting for my breath in blubber.”
The man in question was Shuttleworth, who also edits Theatre Record and says he has “several times pointed out egregious howlers in Tim Walker’s reviews”.
The often childish – “boo hoo, fatty started it” – exchange between the two men was, ironically, much discussed at the long lunch on Monday.
A designer shows us all how to deal with a very bad client who does not want to pay for work. Multiple hat tips to the many folks who sent this in, including Brian Crowley and the talented actress Kacey Camp who had an awesome audition this week for a nerdtastic TV show. Fingers crossed for Kacey.
A sample of the post you must not miss.
Dear Simon,
Disregarding the fact that you have still not paid me for work I completed earlier this year despite several assertions that you would do so, I would be delighted to spend my free time creating logos and pie charts for you based on further vague promises of future possible payment. Please find attached pie chart as requested and let me know of any changes required.
Regards, David.
Haven’t we all had clients like this?
Fantastic uber-meta plagiarism wank as fan artist pinches another artist’s painting to make nice and sweaty pic of Kirk and Spock (Version 2.0). Why Spock is way-green, we do not know. But, he’s naked and hot, so why get picky? Oh yeah, he’s with Kirk. Like that does me a damn bit of good.
Caught pinching a painting she did not do or credit, artist pulls derivative slash painting and related posts. Then it turns out the pinched painting she pinched was pinched from a photo. Now that’s meta. Hat tip to Arlene who sees all wank and knows all wank.
All of this could have been avoided if the pinchers had simply credited the work they pinched. Then everyone would have said “Nice use of reference!” and we’d all move along.
Speaking of plagiarism, a NaNoWrimo writer whose work consisted entirely of plagiarized snippets was banned from the contest. Another one from Arlene.
And a fandom wank on the greying of fandom, which I missed when it came out, but think is must-read. I had meant to write a long, stinging commentary on why traditional science fiction fandom is greying and good riddance to same, but I can’t bring myself to do it without frothing at the mouth. Yes, I realize much about fandom is great. No, I do not think it’s productive to pretend that it is all great.
I recall a long letter in a 1989 Lan’s Lantern (a Hugo-Award winning fanzine to which I used to contribute) on the greying of fandom from a young man who was tired of he and his fellow young fans (male and female) being treated like fresh meat for dirty old fen. They were not welcome at conventions to game, watch movies, or enjoy themselves except as potential targets for a grope. I can relate. And how.
And while every convention is not a weekend at Tailhook, there’s more than one sad saga of Heidi Saha to be found out there. The crass exploitation of the 14-year old in this picture is celebrated by some, but just makes me frickin’ queasy. Her parents started her on this sordid road when she was 12. A quick Google search will bring up many posts by men lamenting the fact that the pretty little girl walked away from fandom when she was at her tastiest.
Yuck.
Boy oh, boy, I do not miss some aspects of fandom at all, and hope they die like the bacteria under my Clorox wipes.
From an interview with Angelique Trouvere:
It was around this point that a short, thirty-something woman with long brown hair strode in, looked at my costume, scowled, and proclaimed, “Oh, that’s so tacky!” and left in a huff. I was like: Who was that? What? No hello?
My friends explained to me, “That’s Heidi’s mother, Taimi Saha.”
Well, it seems that Mrs. Saha hated me from the moment she saw me because she thought that I was stealing her baby’s thunder. I didn’t mean to mess up her plans. I just wanted to enter the masquerade as my favorite character. But to Mrs. Saha, this was supposed to be “Heidi’s con & masquerade” and I was viewed as a potential threat.
Heidi could not have cared less but her mother did, a lot, so she tried to get me barred from entering the competition on the grounds that my costume was cut too low. This was news to me as I was unaware of any problems with it before—after all, it WAS a Vampirella Costume.
Anyway, it was Phil Seuling who came to me and told me that I would have to do something about that if I wanted to enter. He was very nice about it but he felt that he had to back Mrs. Saha on her concerns for decency.
So, let me get this straight, she’s parading her underage daughter around in sexy costumes and she’s concerned about decency? Sheesh!
…She wasn’t entering masquerades anymore, not since some very unsavory stuff went down at the July 1974 Seuling’s Comic Art Con. I believe that Heidi’s father, Art, decided to put a stop to the costuming activities which pleased Heidi to no end. I was very happy for her too.
I think what upsets me about the whole Heidi thing was that she was going through terrible emotional turmoil at that time but felt helpless to do anything about it. Her mother once forced her to dance in front of a gathering of comic professionals at a private party like some trained animal. Friends who witnessed that said that her discomfort was obvious to everyone except Taimi who was too busy playing the cassette recorder she brought with her and shushing the audience.
Heidi had alot of potential but her parents desire for her stardom really messed with her head–and let’s just say that we’re lucky that she didn’t die on us.
Jesus Christ.
c
wow. Never heard of Heidi Saha, but DAMN. I mean, DAMN. Fourteen?
What the hell, fandom? Seriously.
OMG, the pie charts! The pie charts!
*ded from pie. And lulz*
I knew Angelique from year’s back. She told me a lot of candid stories about the old days of fandom. Another fan whose name escapes me sent me some info about Heidi Saha years ago.
I came along years after Heidi, but things hadn’t really changed much. Girls at conventions, and in some cases young guys, were treated like bimbos and himbos…regardless of how they were dressed.
Of course people have the right to dress like Sheena at shows, but we have the responsibility to make sure the convention is a safe venue for all the participants – especially young people – who do not always make responsible decisions for themselves.
I laughed until I cried when I read the designer’s rant. And then promptly reposted and forwarded it. David Thorne is my new design god.
The Open Source Boob Project and Heidi Sala links made me pretty stabby. It’s a subject worthy of an epic rant, which I just don’t have the energy to write at the moment. I wish I had an extra day to write one, though, as it’s something that hits very close to home.
VT, I knew you would appreciate the designer link!
I have been trying to write something about the Heidi Saha/ exploitation at conventions thing for YEARS. I mean it, the Heidi folder has been in my files since I had the old computer.
While the vast majority of fans are pretty cool, I ran into a number of grabby people at cons over the years. Personal dress or presentation has absolutely nothing to do with how people are treated at cons. I’ve never worn skimpy clothes at shows, even when I was a very young girl, but that doesn’t matter.
I recall signing up for a professional organization named ASFA some years back at a Worldcon. I paid my dues, wrote in my name and address, and walked away. Next thing I know, the guy who took my info started following me around. I could not shake him. He followed me to my booth, and no matter how coldly I rebuffed him, he would not leave off.
Then he angrily declared, “You are the least flirtatious woman I have ever met!”
And I shot back, “I am not here to flirt with you. This is my job. I did not give you my address and phone number. I joined a professional organization. I am not here to get picked up. I am here to sell things and talk to fans.”
This did not go over well, and the next thing I know, he was announcing he was going to be driving through the state where I lived and wanted to drop by. I was aghast.
I’m glad for the internet, because I can now see that my experiences aren’t unique. There’s some comfort in that.
I would be very interested to read your epic rant. I think we have a lot of similar problems, too.
Anyway, lousy weather. I had better sign off before lightning eats my computer.
I can’t help myself.
I just had this conversation with a couple of my girlfriends. You know the one – girls get hit on at shows because they are all dressed like Slave Princess Leia.
That’s just not the case.
A couple of years ago at San Diego, I was approached at my booth by a movie producer. I was at my booth with my mom and my Homie Grrl Kacey Camp.
So this producer started putting the blast on me because, as he put it, “You’re classy! I like you! You’re classy!”
It was sort of hilarious and awful at once, but this guy was going for me specifically because I didn’t look like a bimbo.
He practically ORDERED me to meet him at 7 for dinner, and he gave me his number and cell phone number, and his card. He really did the hard sell.
And I did look him up on the internet later, and yep, he’s a genyooine producer with several dozen creds.
This tedious old saw about girls asking for it with the way they dress is infuriating. It doesn’t matter how you are dressed.
There are men who will avoid the girls dressed in skimpy costumes because they are looking for women with a more demure aspect. There are men who are attracted to women who look like they are from the upper classes. There are men who are attracted to certain ethnic groups.
Inappropriate behavior has nothing to do with the victim. Even women in burkhas get molested. The suit you wear as armor against the guy looking for a bimbo will attract the guy looking for a classy dame to mess up a little.
Women can’t be expected to go through their daily lives adjusting their aspect to avoid triggering the individual psychosis of every man they meet.
And we both know how irritating it is to be asked “What were you wearing?” after having a bad experience at a show.
“I was wearing a shapeless black dress that started at my neck and went below my knees. And string of pearls. It is OK to complain about being attacked now?”
Auugh, the ‘What were you wearing?’ question! I froth at the mouth when I hear it.
Okay, yes, I am the plus-size model for a corset manufacturer that caters to geeks and the BDSM scene. Yes, I have worn corsets to SDCC to advertise the products. Just because you can see my breasts does not mean my breasts are available for fondling. I want to staple this to people’s foreheads with a baseball bat.
Here’s the logic:
If they can see it, it’s for grabbing.
If they can’t see it, it’s because you’re a prude. Stop being such a prude! It’s for grabbing.
If it’s conventionally attractive, you should expect it. It’s for grabbing.
If it’s not conventionally attractive, you should be grateful. It’s for grabbing.
and people laugh when I tell them I frequently offer to play bodyguard to cosplayers at SDCC. Until I tell them some stories. The laughter kinda stops after that.
I have to tell you a funny story… this guy called up and wanted the contact info for one of the dancers in the LOVE show, the Beatles Cirque du Soleil show. Specifically the one who dances the lead during “Lady Madonna.” The one who is wearing a babydoll nightgown and appears to be seven months pregnant:
http://www.cirquedusoleil.com/en/~/media/shows/love/images/contenu/characters/lady_madonna.jpg
Yeah. That one. He told me that pregnant women turned him on and he was amazed she was such an energetic dancer while still being that size. When I told him the dancer is not really pregnant, he did not believe me. When I managed to convince him it’s the same dancer that appears earlier, clearly NOT pregnant and in a gogo dancer outfit, he was no longer interested, to the point where he accused the show of fraud, and hung up.
I am SO not making this up. I swear.
People wonder why I’m so cynical. I wonder why more people aren’t. Really.
My jaw has dropped quite a few times at some of the conventions I’ve gone to. While my eyes are grateful for the visuals, I would wonder why these women would set themselves up for harassment. Though as I think about it and read here; there shouldn’t be a mentality of “well, they should have known”.
I’ve worn shirts at cons with logos and expressions that I wouldn’t wear outside and I do so because a convention is a place where people can just let their guard down and be more relaxed. Women shouldn’t have to put their guard up.
Someone I used to go to conventions with (used to due to what happened here) got ticked at me when I grabbed his shoulder before he went to go “chat up” (as he put it) someone in a Wonder Woman outfit. While I agreed with him she was stunning, we had already seen that she had been bothered while she was looking through some backissue bins; so why should he keep the streak going?
Now I thought I’d only hear this in bad movies but he said “c’mon, she comes here dressed as Wonder Woman, she knew what she was getting into.” So I laughed a bit and said “hey, that guy over there just grabbed your sister”. He went looking but didn’t see her or any guy (it didn’t happen, I was trying to gauge his reaction). So I asked what’s the problem since his sister in her Supergirl outfit should expect that and it’s no different than the woman in front of us. Needless to say he didn’t quite get what I was trying to get across about double standards.
I just need to remember to move the eyes not the neck when I see some women in these outfits.
Though would asking someone about their outfit be considered intrusive? I’ve seen some ones that look like ones you couldn’t buy in a store and I thought that would be an “in” to start a conversation. However, with the harassment that goes on at these places, I’d be concerned that it would seem like I had some seedy ulterior motive. Ulterior motive, certainly, but not seedy. 
Jeremy, that was gallant of you to try to reframe the interaction in terms your friend might have a chance of understanding. Colleen and Arlnee have both made good points in that it doesn’t matter *how* a woman is dressed or presents herself, necessarily — they’re still seen as up for grabs, if you’ll forgive the pun.
It’s not necessarily intrusive every time someone approaches to ask about an outfit, and there’s a world of difference in the body language and tone of slightly-awkward-but-well-intentioned men vs. Those Guys. I’ve had many men ask me where to buy the corsets I model because their wife/girlfriend/sister is my size, and they think she’d like one. I don’t mind at all; that’s exactly why I’m wearing one.
If you want to chat someone up, using her costume as an icebreaker, I suggest simply catching her eye, smiling, and saying, ‘Both you and your costume look gorgeous!’ Then wave goodbye, back off, and let her approach you if she chooses. You’ve signaled interest and respect in the same move.
VT post made of win!
Costumers make costumes because they enjoy crafting things. Complimenting someone on that craftsmanship is welcome.
“Nice work! Great costume!”
Complimenting someone on the body parts in that costume is not.
The thing to remember is that other people’s clothes are not a personal message to you.
And whatever language those clothes are speaking may not be your language.
I sometimes approach attractive people to work for me as models at conventions. This can be very awkward for me as well. I am sure some people think I am on the make.
I am as crisp and professional as possible, and there have been no problems.
I hope no one minds if I stray just a tad off-topic…
I sometimes approach attractive people to work for me as models at conventions. This can be very awkward for me as well.
There’s an art studio near me that offers weekly figure drawing sessions with nude models. Usually I manage to do one drawing per session that’s worth posting on my blog (though I’m way behind in actually scanning and posting them!), but I always ask permission before doing so. I strive to ask in the most professional way possible, and I think that’s partly why I have yet to have one of the models say “no.”
One of my best friends usually attends as well, and while I love the guy like a brother I get frustrated by his attitude towards the female models. Not his behavior, mind you — he’s always a perfect gentleman in their presence. But afterwards he often critiques their physical appearance.
He once complained about a female model who is in her 60s or 70s, because he simply couldn’t find a way to make “beautiful” (read: sexually appealing) drawings of her. I have tried explaining to him that true beauty in art is created through the use of gesture and contour, the interplay of light and shadow, and the statement you make by interpreting and rendering what you see in a way that is uniquely yours. Anyone or anything can be the subject matter to create a beautiful piece of art.
Also, these models are human beings. It’s not nice to judge them like a piece of meat, even if it is behind their backs. Perhaps especially because it’s behind their backs.
I love this guy like a brother but his attitude toward figure models makes my molars grind.
Taking this tangent even further, I always strive to be as professional and gentlemanly as I can around nude models, particularly female models. After all, they’re putting themselves in a vulnerable position in order to provide a service that is of extreme value to us as artists. The least I can do is to act like a professional. Yet not every figure model I’ve encountered has been as professional. Some of them have been really… wacky. Really, really wacky. It’s amazing how a naked person with no inhibitions can make a clothed person feel like the one who is vulnerable.
Eep! This has been a long digression. Back to your regularly scheduled, on-topic discussion.
This brings back a lot of memories – I attended the 77 and the 78 NY Creation Conventions and saw Angelique in costume at both. And I remember well the Frank Thorne show with 5 Red Sonjas.
Thanks for the link to that interview.
I never saw Heidi Saha but there was a sad note posted in the Comic art L as follows -
“By the late 1970s, Heidi became in “in-joke” at conventions. She also began to grow in awkward spurts (as teens tend to do).
Rumors that she got into alcohol and drugs by age 16.
Finally, at one sci-fi con at the end of the ’70s, Heidi went into a bathroom, wrapped herself heavily with toilet paper, came out and announced something along the lines of “I know this is what you all have been waiting for”, and set herself on fire! She survived the burns, but pretty much disappeared from the
convention circuit.
She wrote her father’s (Art Saha) obituary in 2000.”
Hopefully she has left the past way behind and is doing well.
Heidi had alot of potential but her parents desire for her stardom really messed with her head…
My girlfriend used to work in child protective. One common thread between many abusive and/or neglectful parents is an inability to understand that it is their responsibility to meet their children’s needs, *not* the reverse.
After attending the Loscon SF con this past weekend, I could make some comment about the greying of fandom . . . but let’s face it, I am the greying of fandom.
Getting people to model for you is always tough. I usually just use the models I’ve gotten to know over the years at the studio, because 1-they’re pros and can hold a pose, unlike friends, and 2-we’re comfortable with each other. But sometimes, they’re not available, and I have to gangpress friends into service. That usually goes something like this incident, which I blogged about last year:
That’s exaggerated slightly for effect, but not much.
Something struck me as odd last night, after reading a bunch of the accounts of the exploitation of Heidi Saha.
Many people claimed that it was BROOKE SHIELDS WHO DID IT FIRST, Heidi looked like BROOKE (no, she didn’t,) and that inspired the Saha’s to tart up their underage daughter.
Well, that’s just not possible.
Heidi Saha is older than me and I’m a little less than two years older than Brooke Shields. So, if Heidi is older than me, and she was on the con circuit dressing as Vampirella when I was a little girl in elementary school…hm.
Pretty Baby, the film that lauched Brooke Shields into public consciousness wasn’t even released until 1978, years after Saha had already been dressed in skimpy costumes and forced to dance in public.
Reads like people are trying to retrofit an excuse for her parents and the other adults who drooled over her.
I remember the people in the fan and pro crowd who seemed to have no trouble with the exploitation of Saha, and even though I didn’t get into fandom until I was 15 – years after Saha was already gone – my memories of these people are not good ones.
There was no social consciousness toward young adults or children and their welfare in that crowd at all. It was a very exploitative environment.
As usually, I caveat that by saying most people in fandom – and many of the pros – were great folks, but the con scene had more than its fair share of predators, male and female.
Seriously, their only interest in us at conventions was in trying to get us to come up to their hotel rooms.
Danny, I was at Loscon too. And although the greying is certainly going on, I did see a fair number of younger fans — and of course the obligatory “raised in fandom” kids. Ran into a whole pack of them when I was leaving the parties on Saturday night.
I really loved conventions… Especially the rumor mill.
Let’s see…
1. there’s the one I attended even though I was in the hospital that weekend.
2. There’s the one where I slept with the GOH. And his wife caught us. This is where it diverges – either I was real good at it and she joined us, or she chased me out into the hotel so I ran down the halls screaming and naked.
3. The convention where I got into a screaming fit over something when I wasn’t even in the country.
4. The convention where I slept with a different man each night, or three.
5. The convention where I was caught stealing in the dealer’s room.
6: getting so drunk I passed out and had a puking hangover in the morning
1 – I was having a miscarriage. 2 – This one became hilarious at the highpoint of that rumor. I must have been good because it persisted for over 2 years. 3 – crying fit, yes, but several years later. Screaming fit? I wasn’t even at the convention it happened at. 4 – I would flirt, but I didn’t want to have sex and would rent my own hotel room or crash on the floor with friends. Now? I’d rent my own hotel room and hide at night. 5 – this is the same convention I spent hours sitting and watching the art show. The theft happened when I was on shift. How could I be two places at once when I was on camera for hours?
Most of those rumors could have been true except they weren’t me. There was this one girl on the same circuit who looked a lot like me, but it wasn’t me. I watched her do the gor thang and the next convention, the rumor was that I had done it. I was into “orion slave girl” not “gorean slave girl” and I reacted to the makeup so that ended quick. I was fully clothed.
What drove me batty was that I was “good enough” to sit for hours in the art show or wander the halls with a radio for hours and hours and hours, but I was not good enough to relieve the radio operator for an hour on a Sunday morning of the convention so she could go join the rest of the concom in a Sunday brunch. I spent 26 hrs that convention volunteering and paying for the privilege of it and they couldn’t trust me, with two other people in the room, to sit at dispatch for an hour during the quiet period. That was the start of my volunteer burn out. Being told I was too officious the next time I volunteered at a convention when there was two feuds between two dealers and two party houses was the last straw. I don’t volunteer at conventions anymore. I think I easily put in at least 24hrs or more per convention. Some I never stopped being a volunteer the entire time and was always on duty.
The one good memory was escorting Marion Zimmer Bradley. She was a sweet thing and something happened. She got spooked and stayed in her hotel room the entire time. I was the only one she would talk to after that and had her signature for the longest time, even got a nice little note from her thanking me for my help.
The other memory was this poor woman who, while I was sitting in the art show watching the back door, started to have some sort of medical problems. I got her help, but mainly stood back to watch. She sent me a thank you card for my help.
I gave up going to conventions. There’s only one person who I would want to see and she doesn’t come out here. If she did, I’d be there. I have a few graphic novels I’d love for her to sign.
oh.. and 6 – I rarely drank, even then. I didn’t have my first hangover till I was nearly 30 and out of the convention scene for a few years at that point.
Lastly, one of the rumor mills was that I caused such a huge scene, which I never figured out what the scene was, that I was banned from this one convention for life, yet the very next convention, someone had passed a photocopied piece of my work off to them to use in their program books for a convention I was banned from(?!?!?!?!). I stayed away because of the rumor. I should have gone to it and pointed at the program book and told the concom off about not having one of the artists they printed be able to attend yet they printed the artwork. I could have given a few hundred signatures that con. I used to have a copy of that program book, not that it matters anymore. I haven’t heard of it in, oh, over a decade now.
I guess I should clarify this… All those rumors happened when I was at the “just becoming legal, but not able to drink stateside” 16-20 and I’m about 9 years younger than you too. I went to my first convention, alone, at 16 and arrived late Sunday. A friend of mine still laughs at how a dare came up for a guy to remove my bra within 30 seconds without taking off my shirt, or lifting it for that matter. He wasn’t able to do it. Then I was counter dared to do the same thing and did. I don’t think he realized I was 16.
There is still a missing gap in the safety of teens/young adults at conventions, and it spills out into other segments of fandom/escapism. It drives me batty to think that there are girls who are 15 who are of age to consent in one state/province, yet in another can’t consent. I know when I was 17/18, I had some old perverts follow me around wanting to exploit me and tried to. Some of the offers were akin to a John’s offer. I still see some of those old fen around and they just make me shudder about what they are doing with the girls who are just blossoming. Thankfully now the laws are far more strict than they were way back then.
This just reminds me of why I always go to conventions with friends. The one thing I am grateful for is that now if I get hit on by a lech I can deal with it with grace and not fall into the self esteem trap as easily as I used to. It still can get me but at least now I can crawl my way out of the emotional sewer easier.
My Gender Women Studies classes have helped a lot with my confidence. I just hate seeing exploitation like that. It makes my skin crawl. I think the classes I’m taking now might do well in high school to help young women know how to deal with this sort of thing.
Of course someone would then say “But you discuss sex so its BAD!” Yeah its bad to discuss sex and exploitation in a high school classroom but you’re supposed to just let it slide when you step out the door because “That’s how it is.”
The fact is its not right. Its just wrong.
Thank you very much for these candid comments. If my hand didn’t hurt so much from drawing all day, be assured I would have a lot more to add here.
Fan politics and gossip: ah, that takes me back.
If it makes you feel any better, I don’t know of any pro who doesn’t have the most outrageous rumors circulating about them.
I really hate this sort of gossip, but there is nothing you can do about it except comfort yourself with the knowledge that people don’t gossip about people who aren’t worth gossiping about.
It’s a measure of where you sit on the totem pole. The higher you sit, the more they gossip about you.
It’s a sign you have something they want. Even if what you have is nothing more than personal happiness. And if they can’t have it, they don’t want you to have it, either.