And say, how do you submit your creative work? Optimum Wound compiled the list so I don’t have to. Portfolio and submission requirements for virtually every publisher! Updated within the last six months. Which means a couple of these places which were on life support are already gone. But many still standing! Get ‘em while they’re solvent.
In an act of pure masochism your friends at Optimum Wound visited the websites of every known comics publisher over the past two months. Back in 2004 Tom Spurgeon over at The Comics Reporter had posted an insanely useful resource page on getting published in comics. It’s still highly recommended reading. It’s been over four years and we wanted to see what had changed. To our surprise we found over 50 places that you could still send your writing and art samples.
Hey, you can’t make this stuff up. It’s up on ebay, and thanks to Jeremy Avery for the hat tip.
Alas, no bids so far.
I am selling my story that I have been creating for 10+ years. (not constantly writing, but of piecing everything together in a cohesive manner) It can be compared to stories like Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Matrix, Indiana Jones and other titles in those categories. This is a really great story I have. This story needs to be completed by a professional writer or Ghost Writer. I am by no means a writer.
Oh, stop.
OK, maybe it’s mean of me to mockity mock this, because it is clearly off the hook. But once in awhile, a publisher comes forward to ask me why I don’t write a Very Bad Freelancer series to go along with my Very Bad Publisher series. There are scores of deluded, untalented, diva-like goofballs out there making life miserable for perfectly nice publishing companies.
Well, conflict of interest (yeah, that’s it,) ’cause I’d have to squeal on my fellow freelancers (and, perhaps, me,) so no.
But I can point you to this utterly daffy ebay auction with a $3,000,000 starting bid, and a buy it now price of $10,000,000. I took a screen shot in case this thing evaporates tomorrow.
I would rather not sell it at all and just find investors to help hire a celebrity Ghost Writer, which would cost 250,000. The company that hires these writers out, guarantee the book to be a New York best seller. From my understanding, a celebrity ghost writer is someone who has written many books for others that have become “best sellers” and are at a point in their writing career to produce these best sellers often.
If George Lucas offered to sell his idea of Star Wars, would you have bought it?
No.
I will share my story with someone in person only and not over the internet. My story is too valuable to be spread publicly and will give a lot of new ideas for movies and book series that should belong to the buyer.
I bet JK Rowling thinks her story is too valuable to be shared publicly! Clearly, she should never have let that publisher put it into print. Now the cat is out of the bag! I know who killed Dumbledore.
This story will bring in endless fame and money to anyone who takes it. I do not have money to hire a Ghost Writer and I do not want to die with this story untold.
Must…stop…laughing…
And for the people reading this post who think I’m crazy for asking this amount of money for it; this kind of money is a drop in the bucket for large corporations. If it sounds like too much money then you are not the kind of buyer I’m looking for.
Well, OK then.
I know a Hollywood A-list screenwriter or three who doesn’t get that kind of money for a proposal, or even a final screenplay. It’s too bad Spielberg is such a skinflint. Otherwise, he could afford you.
Oh, look, I didn’t notice before. He’s thrown in free shipping.
For a $3,000,000 CD, I sure as hell should hope so.
I was jobless, a lone parent, and as poor as it is possible to be in modern Britain, without being homeless….I was the biggest failure I knew…failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me. Had I really succeeded at anything else, I might never have found the determination to succeed in the one arena I believed I truly belonged.
NO CLIENT WILL RESPECT YOU IF YOU LET THEM EXPLOIT YOU.
Chintzy clients do not lead to bling assignments.
Famous people do not sprinkle stardust on you.
The only thing that matters is your portfolio and business savvy.
Exploiters never stop exploiting. They do not change. They will not start paying you decent rates someday. They will not learn to respect you as a human being.
Take your ball and go home. Leave. Get an attorney. Walk away. Don’t look back except to sue the bastards.
And if you aren’t doing these things…
What are you afraid of?
Are you afraid no one else will hire you? Do you really believe this publisher you don’t even work for has some kind of magical powers that can steal your appeal from you so no one else will ever want you?
You don’t really believe that.
If you do not have enough confidence in your work to walk away from a client which is treating you like dirt, lying to you, and stealing from you, then you do not have enough confidence to be in this business.
You have to believe other people want you. You have to believe your work is powerful.
And if you don’t believe that, I cannot help you at all.
Official Katy Perry music video. Not just because it’s an upbeat tune, but because she’s wearing cool threads that look like she went shopping on Ovanan.
A professional artist makes money with art. If you do not make money with art, that does not mean you are not an artist. If you don’t make money with your art, that says absolutely nothing about the quality of your art. It does not devalue the importance of your art in any way. The only person in the world who can make art exactly like you is you. The art you make is completely unique because you are unique and that art came from you.
